I wrote a #bloggerconfessions post a few months ago and Nick did her own blogger confessions post too and a lot of you seemed to like them, but many expressed how you either wished you could confess a few things of your own, or how scared you were to say how you really feel about certain things. Nick and I thought it would be a fun idea to share more of our confessions and see if any of you wanted to share a few of your confessions too!
I’m really relieved not only because I’ve been wanting to get a few of these off my chest for a while, but because a lot of you guys feel the same way we do. I do not like the direction blogging is going, and I’m hoping that if people realize how many of of are annoyed by certain habits, maybe it will shift back.
Anyway, the point of this post and today’s confessions are not to start drama. This is a place to share your thoughts about blogging and to get a few things off your chest. If you missed your chance to add your own confession, feel free to add it in the comments! It doesn’t have to be a super secret deep dark confession, it can be anything related to blogging. We’ll be tweeting confessions throughout the day using the hashtag #bloggerconfessions if you want to follow or add your own confessions on Twitter too.
- I really hate when bloggers brag about their authors being their ‘friends’ or getting ARC’s from their author ‘friends.’ Just because you
kiss asstalk to an author on social media, it doesn’t make them your friend. And I can’t help but wonder if you would be ‘friends’ if they weren’t authors and you weren’t a blogger. #letsbereal <– I’m not saying it’s possible to be friends with an author, but let’s also not pretend that the reason you are probably even talking is because we are authors and they are bloggers and it’s a beneficial relationship to both parties. And like all my confessions, this doesn’t apply to everyone, but all the ‘my good friend sent me this ARC!’ make me wanna barf. Especially when that blogger only got that ARC cause they don’t shut up about the book on Twitter.
- Dear Authors: Just because I love your books doesn’t mean I want to be friends with you. I will read and review your books, support you, favorite/RT your tweets, share sales and recommend the hell out of your books. But let’s just leave it at that so things don’t get weird if I ever not like one of your books. #itsnotpersonal #istilllikeyou
- I cringe thinking about the possibility of bloggers being paid to review or or write sponsored posts someday. If there is so much dishonesty and shadiness right now when it comes to a $15 or less book that will be out anyway, I’m scared to think what questionable methods bloggers may resort to when money is on the line.
- I know that there some are bloggers out there who charge for reviews or for featuring a book AND DON’T DISCLOSE IT which is not only a douche move, but it’s also illegal.
- I think there are so many bloggers out there who are blogging for publicists (in order to stay in their good graces, aka get more ARC’s). It’s okay to say no to a review request or promo request! I’ve completely ignored emails from publicists that I’ve worked with before since like August when I was dealing with my house issues and I still get ARC’s and I still keep getting emails. They won’t forget about you if you don’t participate in everything they pitch you!
- Debut Author features have been around since I started blogging back in 2011, and probably even before that! Just because someone does a debut author feature, doesn’t mean that every body else is banned from doing it, or that they are ‘copying’ you if they do. And really, can we come up with another idea already???
- After 4 years and three blog name changes, I finally loooooove my new blog name. And yes, it came to me in a dream. And it’s totally inspired by the book Nick & Nora’s Infinite Playlist. And no, I haven’t read the book yet… (hides in shame)
- I have more than 800 physical books on my bookshelves in my book room. I am officially out of space on my four 6-shelf bookcases and have had to resort to stacking books horizontally on top of other books. I have space in my room for one more bookcase and that’s it. I don’t know what I will do with my books after that. And yes, I do give away a bunch to my niece and to my local library.
- I had to take out my TV from my book room to make room for my books. #notevensorry
- Lately, I seem to have only two reading modes. It either takes me forever to finish a book (more than a week) or else I binge and end up finishing a book in less than 24 hours. There seems to be no in between. I admit the second case doesn’t happen often, but it’s so nice when it does happen.
- Netflix takes up a lot of my reading time… and I don’t even feel bad about it.
- I rarely ever carry a book with me when I go somewhere. Not even my kindle. It’s rare that I have time to read when I’m out of my house, but if I do I have ebooks and audiobooks on my phone.
- I like to say ‘fuck’ in my reviews (if you haven’t noticed yet) … because why the fuck not. 🙂
- I feel guilty that I never promote any of our blog posts on Twitter (other than automatic tweets), but I haaaaaaaaate Twitter! I’m gonna try to learn how to at least schedule tweets for 2016.
- One of the reasons I dislike Twitter so much is because I stay away from certain bloggers and no matter that I’ve unfollowed over 1000 people this past year (sorry, it’s not personal!) I can’t seem to get away from their tweets.
- If I could blog in the shower I would be such an awesome blogger, I swear all my reviews and post ideas come to me when I’m in the shower. Unfortunately, I forget almost everything once I’m out.
- I don’t like that in this community, speaking your mind almost always leads to drama. If everyone is afraid to say what they think, no matter how silly it may be, then how can I trust your reviews if you’re always afraid to either hurt someone’s feelings or upset someone???
- I know for a fact that certain bloggers didn’t like November 9 but still gave it 4 or 5 stars because ‘they were afraid of backlash.’ And you wonder why I don’t trust bloggers…
- Bloggers that rate books 6 stars or 6++ stars or ‘top favorites’ are ruining the rating system for the rest of us. A favorite book is a favorite book. There should be different levels of favorite…
- I don’t understand how some bloggers are so popular and influential when their ‘reviews’ are basically a long summary of the…book summary. #whereisyouropinion
- I hate when bloggers/readers uprate a book they didn’t like or didn’t like as much simply because they are big fans of the author. You can be the biggest fan and it’s still okay to not love one or more of their books. Doesn’t make you less of a fan. Yes it happens. A lot.
- This ‘groupie’ mentality that some fan bases have for certain authors (especially in the indie world) is super intense and scares me away from readers those author’s books.
- I hate how some bloggers are considered celebrities that can never do any wrong.
- It’s sad that bloggers who are really loud on twitter and won’t shut up about certain books/authors (especially debut authors) are considered better than other bloggers and that certain authors/publicists treat them better just because they…kiss ass.
- Dear debut authors: we see what you are doing by 5 starring and gushing about EVERY other debut book. The book is probably 5 stars, probably not. But the fact that you are an author too, just makes your rating mean nothing to me. Seeing a debut book have all 5 stars on GR, and the majority of those reviews being from debut or author friends just seems shady to me.
- I wish Goodreads didn’t let other authors rate books, or let you filter them out at least. Author reviews mean nothing to me. (yes, I’ve been burned by author praise so many times). Of course they are gonna love the book!
- If you are offended by one of my confessions…then you are probably guilty of doing them.
- I refuse to apologize for speaking my mind.
- If it weren’t for my friendship with Nick and Megan and blogging with Nick, I would have stopped blogging last year. I’m so glad I didn’t because as many issues I have with book blogging, I also love it.
- I miss the good old days when we read books simply because they sounded good. Not because we want a coveted ARC or want to be friends with an author.
- I am so annoyed by so many shady author practices when it comes to selling books. All the ‘buy my book and I will donate to X charity!’ or ‘buy my book before it’s pulled from all platforms forever!’ is so shady. What happened to buying a book because it sounded good? If a book sounds good, I will buy it. I don’t need any other antics to entice me.
- Not every sentence of your review needs to sound like a wanna-be blurb. If I need a freaking dictionary to read your review, then I’m outta there! #layoffthethesaurus
- I used to be jealous of people who could read 300+ books a year, but I realized over the summer that for me, it was possible to be burnt out on books.
- I miss Sam from Realm of Fiction everyday. She was one of the first bloggers I befriended and a blogger that I aspired to be like. I’m sad that she no longer blogs or has an online presence. 🙁
- Dear bloggers who won’t stop buttering up authors and talking to them on Twitter 24/7 and giving them nicknames, I can see through your bullshit ways. I can also tell you, I’m not the only one who knows that you’re doing it either for popularity or to snag ARCs from them. Just so you know, it’s tacky as hell.
- Dear same bloggers as above, I don’t trust your reviews. It’s VERY hard for me to believe that you’re unbiased in your review for books of your author “friends”. Once again, I’m not the only one, so maybe you need to check your priorities.
- Sometimes, I’ll see bloggers who request/receive every book and wonder if they’ll even read them all. I think it’s a waste of money/books when they go to people who barely review books.
- I think “How to” book blogger posts are stupid, offensive and hurtful. Let people blog the way they want and do whatever the heck they want. Don’t try to shame me or anyone for writing mini-reviews, posting promotional posts or a slew of memes. If you don’t like that, fine, just move on to another website.
- I am sick and tired of the million 2016 debut author features. One was fine. Two was fine. But now it seems like everyone and their mother is doing one and they are all essentially promo blitzes that don’t really tell me more about a book than I would have learned on Goodreads. I’m also doubtful that everyone doing these features is doing it to really help these authors out. Thank goodness for the “Mark as read” button on Bloglovin!
- I have never read the Harry Potter series nor have I watched the full movie series. I never got the appeal when I was younger. BUT I’m currently in the process of reading them right now and I’m glad I waited until I was 22 because I have a different kind of appreciation for it.
- I don’t like threesomes in my books (totally random I know, but at the time I’m typing this one, I’m just coming off of a reading a book with one). I think books with them need to come with a disclaimer. I can’t deal with free love.
- I constantly worry that I’m insignificant in this community because I don’t have that many friends on Twitter and such. At the same time, I’m beyond thankful for all the great friends I also do have.
- I feel very very awkward when authors follow me on Twitter, especially if I haven’t read a book by them. I worry that I will hate their book and they’ll see my review and get hurt.
- I can get internally defensive when I see someone bash/hate on a book that I like, but I’m also smart enough not to lash out and understand that different people have different opinions.
- I like to look at overall Goodreads averages from friends and non-friends and if someone has a very low rating (less than 3), then I’ll be confused and sad. Why read books from a genre you know you mostly hate over and over? It just seems like such a waste of time to me, not to mention, incredibly depressing.
- I worry that my reviews sound repetitive all the time.
- Sometimes, I’ll write a review for a book like 15 minutes it’s supposed to go live. I really need to work on this.
- I’m a very romance-driven reader – the chance that I”ll pick up a book without a romance is almost non-existent. I want to change that because I know I’m missing out.
- I suck at Instagram. I don’t really have cool props lying around to take fun photos. And also, it takes me forever to be happy with what something looks like, so it would probably take me 2 days to take a photo of one book.
- Starting the new blog with Nereyda was the best decision I’ve ever made. I feel so much relaxed about posting and reading.
Fellow Blogger/Anonymous Confessions:
- I still request far too many books that I don’t read. My Netgalley account at the end of 2015 after four years is at 60%. I am really really trying to work on that. I am ashamed to admit that far too many of my requests are based on flashy covers, and often I request without even thoroughly reading the synopsis. Yes, I have a problem. – Heidi @Rainy Day Ramblings
- I get so annoyed by some bloggers who say they aren’t in it for the ARCs but totally are. Actions speak louder than words.
- I let my blog stats/facebook likes determine my self worth as a blogger! I know it shouldn’t matter, but I care! When someone unsubscribes or unlikes my blog, I obsess over why! When no one comments or likes a post, I get super sad! – The Book Disciple
- Even though it takes me less time to actually sit down and read the book, if the audio book is available, I’m ten times more likely to listen to that.
- Sometimes I enter giveaways for books I already own. – Zach @Zach’s YA Reviews
- I freak out whenever someone tries to at least overly-bend one of my books’ covers or tries to ruin them from their perfect state. When I let you borrow a book, it needs to be given back to me in the same condition. (Sorry, I get a bit OC with books most of the time xD) – Mara @Mara Was Here
- I can only read in silence most of the time. if I have my earbuds in and a song I love comes on – jhene aiko or whatever – I’ll literally probably throw the book aside and concentrate on the song alone or start looking for the full album – Peach @Rebelle Reads
- I love actual books but lately I’ve been reading faster on my kindle. – Peach @Rebelle Reads
- I’ve noticed that there is a trend going on in the blogosphere, and that is more or less “sucking up to publishers and authors to get ARCs”. I know it doesn’t affect me personally, and neither am I crazy about ARCs, but that is mainly what I see on my Twitter feed nowadays. And I just find it unhealthy for the blogging community because 1) What is the line between bloggers and publishers/authors and 2) Are we being used as a free marketing tool? and 3) This is creating a ton of competition in the community, and everything just feels incredibly tense. Now, many bloggers are doing the same thing, hosting Twitter chats, featuring debut authors and books in some way (make it stop please! It’s too much!), or tweeting to publishers about wanting an ARC when a picture is posted. I’m not putting all the blame on bloggers though, publishers definitely know that all this ARC competition is good for marketing, which is why they aren’t bothered by any of it.
So that’s my confession. And obviously I can’t talk about it in public, except through private DMs with my closest friends. But yeah, this kind of bothers me not because of ARC envy, but because it is affecting the community as a whole. And it makes me sad. – Anonymous
- I feel like blogging has become more about who you know rather than who you are. – Anonymous
- I feel like there’s been a wave of bloggers who have come into this expecting to get everything without any work or effort at all. And I can tell who they are by the lack in original content. – Anonymous
- I do care about the stats, way more than I should. Way more than I want to. It’s hard to ignore. – Anonymous
- I thought about this for a long time before deciding what to say, and there’s a lot. First, the good for me far outweighs the bad in the book world. That said, sometimes the bad can overwhelm me, and it’s nice to get it out. – Anonymous
- I work hard at this- too hard, probably. It’s supposed to be a hobby, yet I compete with myself every day. I pretty much drive myself insane, even though it IS still incredibly fun for me. – Anonymous
- The negative stuff takes its toll though. I am so sick of the nonsense. I am sick of people in a BOOK community having to be told that plagiarism is not okay. I am sick of people judging each other. I am sick to death of the ass-kissing for books, and then turning around and berating people for having “ARC envy”. You know what? Yeah, I get a little incensed that I have worked my ass off and some people make it into a popularity contest. – Anonymous
- I am sick of “ARC Envy” being a negative thing. Unless someone is being rude (which is never okay) or like, saying something to an author or publisher (also very not okay), how about we let people feel what they feel? – Anonymous
- I get particularly stabby when the community at large bitches about people thinking of ARCs as “free books” and then not realizing that WE are basically free promotional tools. So you know what? If I am going to be a promotional tool, yeah, I will take a book, thanks. Because I can’t be paying someone ELSE to be a promotional tool all the time. I get how this works- I am not saying that it’s WRONG that we are marketing strategies- I knew what I was signing up for, as I assume everyone does when requesting a book- but then don’t act holier than thou by saying it’s blasphemous to take a “free” book. Because nothing is free. – Anonymous
- Mostly, I want to be able to speak my damn mind. I have been afraid to do that for a long time. And since I am posting this without my name, I guess I still am. – Anonymous
- I love 99.999% of the things that happen here. But let’s just remember that there’s ALWAYS another point of view, another side to every story, no matter the situation. – Anonymous
- And to end on a positive note, this community saved me. Things have been hard for me- really hard- personally. And before I got involved with book blogging, things were really bad. Now I feel like I have a home and a voice, and I will be eternally grateful. – Anonymous
- OH and I confess that I am so happy that Nick and Nereyda have teamed up and have one of my favorite blogs ever. <3 – Anonymous
- Inflated ratings are EVERYWHERE. It makes me want to punch people in the face. – Anonymous
- I feel like a lot of the time my blog is wasted and no one is reading or even visiting my blog. Makes me want to give up multiple times a week. – Anonymous
- I hate leaving a comment on a blog and the blogger either never responds or doesn’t visit my blog and comment. – Anonymous
- I really don’t get bloggers who tweet things like “I got a super exciting email in my inbox from @publicistX”. What is the point of such tweets other than to name-drop and try to make others feel jealousy? Don’t tell me you’re trying to help publicize the book or just being nice to say thanks to the publicist. Because no, you’re not publicizing the book and you can thank the publicist in an email. – Anonymous
- I trust very few reviewers. There are certain bloggers where it’s clear they’re “friends” with publicists for the perks and nothing more. If they’d have met on the street, they wouldn’t be friends. – Anonymous
- I am so annoyed by all those bookish rep searches… Most of us already love the products and would buy the products on our own. We don’t need someone who takes pretty pictures to tell us to buy it and it annoys me that their blog/social media accounts basically turn into infomercials which feel very forced… – Anonymous
- No matter what some people say, this community is very cliquey. – Anonymous
- The book blogging community is not all fucking rainbows and sunshine. There are a lot of problematic underlying issues. – Anonymous
Do you agree or disagree with any of these confessions?
Let us know in the comments below!
Thank you to everyone who submitted a confession!
Latest posts by Nick & Nereyda (see all)
- The Weekly Recap (226): NYC Adventures & What’s Up With Mother Nature? - March 12, 2017
- The Weekly Recap (225) : Sunshine & Trips Ahead - February 26, 2017
- The Weekly Recap (224): Long Week & Workouts - February 19, 2017